“…An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.” 1Cor.7:34
As single mothers, we often feel low on the totem pole, especially in church. Society, even the society of the church, may make us feel as if we are not good women, after all, if we were good, a man would marry us (or a man would not have left us).
But God’s Word says differently. Now, mind you, these words are from Paul – and he clearly states this was not a word from God, but rather his judgment. That is important to realize, especially considering the whole chapter. However, it IS in the Bible, and “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,” 4 Tim. 3:16
So, keeping all of this in mind, we, as single parents, need to realize that we actually have a better position to glorify God. Notice, it does not only say a virgin, but also unmarried women. And….there is no mention of the word unless. It does not say unless she is divorced, or unless she has children, or unless she used to live with a man. It just says unmarried women.
We are considered MORE able to serve God in our singleness!
According to these verses, married women have an extra concern – how to please their husband. That is a Godly call. It is a beautiful thing when a woman truly concerns herself with this. I have friends that have been married for 20 or more years, and the one thing I noticed about each of those marriages is that the wife really is concerned about making sure her husband is happy. They are excellent wives.
But back to us, the single girls. We, in our single position, now only have to please our Holy Husband – God.
“For your Maker is your husband– the LORD Almighty is his name– the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.” Isaiah 54:5
Now, let’s look at the ways we can do this.
- Be devoted in Body
- Be devoted in Spirit
Interestingly, the first devotion is in body. Why would this come before spirit? Well, I am not sure about Biblical times, but I know that today, it is easy to slip into using your body dishonorably to attract a man. We all know it’s true. But we are not called to attract a man (and certainly not that way!). We are called to be devoted to Him with our bodies.
How do we do this? First and foremost, by remaining pure. Yes, pure. Not an easy call in the current culture. If you want to date – even some Christian men – telling them you will remain pure until you are married can send them running. It may take a great deal of prayer, and it may cause you some dating opportunities. No problem. Your devotion is to the Lord. Honor Him with your purity.
Secondly, we can show our devotion by dressing modestly. That does not mean we have to look frumpy and ugly. Looking put together, well groomed, and crisp and clean can be done in a modest fashion. Beth Moore (I just love her) is an excellent example of this. Have you noticed (go ahead and look at some Google images of her) she shows not a hint of cleavage? Often, she is buttoned up to the top. And, she often wears longer shirts and jackets that cover her backside. She is serious about her modesty, but she always looks so cute! She is trendy, neat, put together, and attractive. She is honoring God with her modesty.
Next, we should be devoted to Him in Spirit. Remembering that the Holy Spirit dwells in us, we must nurture and develop our Spirit. How is this done? By spending time in His Word. By spending time in prayer. By memorizing Scripture we can bring to mind in any situation. By having a gentle and quiet Spirit, as He tells us.
So, remember that God does not see us as less than because we are not married. Rather, He sees in us a unique opportunity to serve Him through a life of undivided devotion to Him.