Today, for my son, I am focusing on friendships.
Right now, he has chosen some really nice friends. My son is a little shy….not impressed at all with the “cool kids”. He finds people obsessed with being popular rather immature and odd. I wish I had that level of maturity at his age!
Some of his friends I simply adore (if you are reading this, Melanie, you know your sweet son is one of them). Some of his friends are questionable in various ways, but certainly not bad kids. My son has a really solid view of who he is and what he believes. He is a stubborn rock when it comes to his convictions. Praise God.
However, there may come a time when others cause him to question what he believes…or a time when they may try to pressure him to do something he really does not want to do. (Although, he is 6’1” and built like a linebacker at 15, so he could probably just step on them.)
When he plays video games, I have to admit, I stand outside of his door and listen to his half of the conversations. He tells me that there is a great deal of cussing online (as there is in the locker and weight rooms of his football team). I am always happy to not hear foul language coming out of my son’s mouth. There are times when he speaks harshly or in a manner I find inappropriate. So, later, I will talk to him about it – calmly. He is usually responsive and not argumentative.
Before you tell me I am wrong to “spy”, just save your breath. I fully think every parent not only has the right to “spy” on their child, but also the responsibility. You can try to argue me on this, but I will dig in. I want to be able to guide my son as long as he is in the house.
However, he will leave the house one day (gasp), and I want him not only to have a firm foundation, but to also have a great support group of friends to help him in his journey. I have the most amazing friends – some are believers, some are not, but they are all amazing, supportive, loving women. I am proud to call them my friends. I want the same for my son.
The first, and most important verse that makes me think of friendship is:
Proverbs 27:17 Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.
I want men in my son’s life, close wonderful friends, that will be the iron in his life. Men who will push him and challenge him in his walk with the Lord, and in every aspect of his life. Having a base of close, strong Christian friends will help keep him accountable in everything he does and says. If he has a big fight with his wife, I want him to go to these men, not to a non-believer who may tell him to leave her. If he is facing a dilemma at work, I want him not to talk to someone planted firmly in this world, but someone planted firmly in the Word. I have told my son, time and time again, that I have found nothing in the Bible that has not held true. Every mistake I made in my life was warned against, and everything right thing, though completely opposite of this world, has come from the Word of God.
Then, there are countless other Scriptures on friendships:
Proverbs 12:26 One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
Proverbs 13:20 Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Proverbs 14:6-7 A scoffer seeks wisdom in vain, but knowledge is easy for a man of understanding. Leave the presence of a fool, for there you do not meet words of knowledge.
Proverbs 22:24-25 Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.
1 Corinthians 15:33 Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”
Most of these point to staying away from those on a destructive path. Great advice! I know in my life this has been proven, over and over.
I want my son’s friends to be worshippers and followers of Jesus, but even more, I want them to be practicing Christians. You know, there are the “fire insurance Christians” (I used to very much be one). Then there are those practicing what Jesus says – even if it is done imperfectly.
However, with that said, he still must go into the world to witness. I definitely am not saying he should not befriend people who are not Christians. However, his core group of friends, I pray, are all walking with the Lord.
Tonight I come to thank You for my friends, and for my son’s friends. I love that friends are mentioned in the Bible, Lord, because my friends are closer to me than my family. I know it is that way for many.
I pray, Lord, that you provide my son with Christian friends who will challenge him in His relationship with You and his relationships with others.
Lord, I pray that my son does not experience too much loneliness. I pray that he has friends that love and appreciate him, friends that make him laugh the way mine do for me. Please, Lord, let these boys/men be so firmly rooted in You that they give my son advice that would please You. And they would spend time doing things that glorify You. I pray that they are the kind of friends that would get out of bed at two in the morning to come help him, if needed. And Lord, please make my son that kind of friend, and that kind of man.
This is a short prayer, Lord…I guess there is not a lot to pray about with friends. They are probably the most simplistic, but the most rewarding, relationships we have on this earth. Thank You for such a gift. Please bless my son with amazing friends, and let him be a blessing to his friends.
In Jesus’ name I pray,